No One Wears a Knife Like Honey Ryder: The Video!

Watch out for women who wear knives with their bikini. Inspired by James Bond’s Dr. No, and of course Ursula Andress in that iconic bikini, this is an exotic, sexy and sophisticated blonde bombshell of a drink. With Liquore Strega, with its 70 secret ingredients (with tastes of fennel, cinnamon, juniper, and saffron), Aperitivo Cocchi Americano, today’s answer to Kina Lillet (with citrus and quinine), and the botanically forward Plymouth Gin, with Ginger-Lemon bitters and lime. “With a twist…” Click here to watch the action-packed VIDEO from KEVIN'S COCKTAIL MINUTE: "NO ONE WEARS A KNIFE LIKE HONEY RYDER" Fending off a villain true to my idiom. (That's a lime.) Shaken, not stirred! Putting

The Uranium: A Drink That's Almost Radioactive

“There’s nobody that understands the horror of nuclear better than me. The sale of the uranium that nobody knows what it means, I know what it means. You know what uranium is, right? This thing called nuclear weapons and other things, like lots of things are done with uranium, including some bad things.” —Donald Trump (the leader of the Free World) So with this in mind, we need a new drink that's strong, that's kickass, that's nearly radioactive. Break out the Geiger counters and pour a few rounds, because how bad can it get? THE URANIUM 1 part Stolichnaya Vodka
 1 part Beefeater’s London Dry Gin
 1 part Romana Sambuca Shake vigorously over ice as if there's no tomorrow. And this impa

A Touch of Class Warfare & a New Cocktail

Born and bred to be Dickheads. Kick their asses NOW, while you have the chance! “Life is a continual process of either being brainwashed or being disabused.” —Kevin Kunundrum “Blacks and whites, Liberals and Republicans, they’re not each others' enemies. It's all misdirection.” —Kevin Kunundrum “Agent Smith” from The Matrix declared that “Human beings are a disease, a cancer.” Yes, but I believe he was being too general. It is actually The Super Rich, The One-Percenters who are the cancer, the plague. To them, the world is a game, with The 99%, meaning the rest of us, as the pieces. And they pit us against each other

Mission Impossible: A New Cocktail of The Resistance

"Good morning, Mr. Phelps. This man, Donald Trump, is the megalomaniacal dictator of America. Eager to use his country's stockpile of nuclear weapons, there is mounting evidence that he has gone insane. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to eliminate Trump before he initiates World War Three, and to restore democracy to this once proud nation." Here is a drink with the hope that the IMF will come to the rescue. After all, the IC (Intelligence Community) is nobody's fool, least of all the Narcissistic Nabob's. "This tape will self-destruct in five seconds... Good Luck, Jim..." MISSION IMPOSSIBLE 1 part Absolut Citron Vodka ¾ part Pama Pomegranate Liqueur
 ½ part Yellow Char

Lowball: A New Cocktail, & New Lyrics to an Old Song

"The Colonel Bogey March" dates back to 1914 in Great Britain, and was originally about golf. It enjoyed a new life in World War II as an inspirational song against Hitler and "The Master Race", and then again as the famous tune whistled in the 1957 film "The Bridge on the River Kwai". Current events being what they are, I felt it was high time to reintroduce the song, with updated lyrics, along with an accompanying cocktail.* Here is the song's melody: "The River Kwai March" and here are the lyrics from WWII: Hitler has only got one ball Göring has two but very small Himmler has something sim'lar But poor old Goebbels has no balls at all and now here are my updated lyrics: Trumpler ha

Mickey Mantle On Deck: A New Cocktail

As a break from political turmoil, I recall the pure thrill and beauty of sports, this realm where we push ourselves to the limits of human achievement through competition. The unadulterated spontaneity of sport has always been inspiring; of striving, of never giving up, of succeeding. Like baseball, where in the glorious pre-steroid days, a record was indeed a record (asterisks notwithstanding), and the amazing feats accomplished were even more amazing because of this utter spontaneity. Reggie Jackson’s three home runs on three consecutive pitches... Mickey Mantle’s titanic blasts. I wax nostalgic for an age long gone (in which I wasn’t even born). The 1950s, the New York Yankees, and Numbe

There's a Mister Death at the Door: A Cocktail for Dark Contemplation

This is not a feel-good cocktail. It's not smooth and delicious with that hint of sweetness. Rather, it's bitter, intense, spicy, and surprisingly potent, like drinking hot sauce straight from the bottle. It's the liquid embodiment of that long dark night of the soul. And if you make it through two of these, you will feel 87.3% less existential, guaranteed! I'm not even sure if it should be drunk by itself because it's too much. Perhaps as the perfect accompaniment to a nice plate of nachos, as you try to dash those nagging thoughts of mortality. What follows is an excerpt (amended) from my memoir, TALES OF INSOMNIA DESPAIR & THE PERFECT COCKTAIL, where this recipe first appeared... It’s i

Enough Politics! Here's an Appletini!

Don't worry, be happy! Let's put politics and imminent doom aside for a moment and have a drink that's pure happiness. After all, green drinks make people happy, and the happiest green drink of all is the "Appletini". Although this "Appletini" is subtler, more elegant, with its cool pale green color set off by the artistic lemon peel. It's smooth as can be, with a tartness that's just right, with that hint of Chartreuse. The "Perfect Appletini", unlike any other. PERFECT APPLETINI 1½ parts Tito’s Vodka
 1 part Dekuyper Sour Apple Pucker
 ¼ part Green Chartreuse Shake or stir over ice, then pour into a chilled cocktail glass.
 Garnish with a smile and a lemon twist. "Forget mustard gas!

Buyer's Remorse: Are We Feeling Great Yet?

We are apparently living inside someone's satire. With this in mind, here is a bitterly refreshing drink with which to wash down those bitter pills we've been given every day. (Again, take a vacation already!) But first, these commercial messages... Welcome back! And now for the drink... BUYER’S REMORSE 1 part Absolut Hibiskus Vodka 1 part Kinky Pink Liqueur ½ part Luxardo Maraschino Liqueur ½ part Agave Lime Cocktail Mixer (Morris Kitchen) ¼ part fresh-squeezed Lime juice dash of Bittermens Boston bitters Shake over ice, then pour into a tall rocks glass. Garnish with a lime wheel and a tall tale. Cures Rheumatism and Catarrh! Are you feeling great yet? Good! Then I got just the

The Curious Rise & Precipitous Fall of the Orange Oligarch: A Cocktail of Hope

What's happened to America is beyond disturbing, beyond the comic and the ridiculous. In the hopes of the fall happening sooner rather than later I offer a potent drink, and a poem (with apologies to Stephen Sondheim, Leonard Bernstein, and West Side Story)... When you’re a Trump You’re a Trump all the way From your first sniffle of coke To your last boastful bray. When you’re a Trump You can do what you please, You got buttloads of dough And unlimited sleaze. You’ve built a Trump Tower To make up for small hands. With no subtlety or class But over-active glands, You’ll give a low five to the Pretty girls that you meet And you’ll brag to your pals But it’s no great feat To be a ca

I Hate Billionaires: Why? Because They Suck!

SNAPCHAT, that dubious, unnecessary app of the "Selfie Generation" for recording those superfluous, redundant self-portraits that are so worth preserving that they self-delete in 24 hours, will have their IPO soon. The two Millennials responsible will become instant billionaires. Once again, some cynical little college twerps who live at home with their Mommies create a ridiculous template (see Facebook) for the mindless masses, and an advertising platform, aka their personal ATM. Just because we can make something of dubious value doesn't mean we have to make it. Just because the masses crave bull excrement doesn't mean they should be obliged. Meanwhile, artists, writers, and musicians, the

Retro Cocktail for February: Moscow Mule

The “Moscow Mule” was not invented in Moscow, Russia. Nor does it have anything to do with the hoofed barnyard animal we know as a mule. However, there is a family of cocktails that falls under the name “buck” or “mule”, and these all feature ginger beer or ginger ale and citrus juice (along with liquor, of course). And since this cocktail was created at the outset of World War Two (before Russia became our Cold War nemesis), “Moscow” was added as a friendly nod to our soon-to-be allies against Hitler (not to mention the alliteration). Like most famous cocktails, its origins are up for debate. The most current tale is that Jack Morgan, the owner of The Cock ’n’ Bull Restaurant on Sunset Boul

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                                     ©2016, ©2017 by Kevin Postupack.

 

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