C is for Celeritas: A Fast Drink for When Things Are Slow

Ideally, you should drink this cocktail when you’re stuck in traffic. In Einstein’s famous equation, E=mc2, the “c” is the speed of light, which, as anyone remotely knowledgeable in Science knows, is really effing fast. 186,000 miles per second, give or take. That’s like way faster than the Autobahn. In fact, from our POV, it’s instantaneous. Which is how today’s new cocktail was inspired. Okay, here’s the scene... You’re on the road, stopped in traffic at a red light. There are four cars ahead of you. You wait and wait for the interminable light to change, but it’s still red. RED. RED. RED. RED. You impatiently drum your fingers to “My Sharona”, which for some reason is on the radio. You fi

Ginger Not Mary Ann: A Glamorous, Captivating Cocktail

Today’s new drink is a victory for Science. Think of “Gilligan’s Island”, that supremely silly sitcom from the Sixties. (Four alliteration points!). That ill-fated three-hour tour that turned into the very first episode of “Survivor”, as seven souls from all walks of life became castaways on an uncharted desert isle. And because of the G-rated mores of that bygone era, a situation ripe with sexual promise became an exercise in wholesomeness that would make the Amish proud. But looking back now with 21st century eyes—not to mention a collective sensibility that has seen much since those innocent days—we see that among the seven unfortunate castaways, two are attractive young women of child-be

Us & Them: A Unifying Cocktail

Did you ever notice that whenever somebody creates some exclusive group, that they always happen to be included in it? For example, an atheist would never envision a brand new religion called Islam, where Infidels would be put to death by beheading, since by definition, the creator himself would be an Infidel! Or some Jewish guy back in 1910 comes up with this theory about these tall, racially-pure, blonde-haired, blue-eyed Teutonic types he calls “Aryans”. And his theory goes on to say that these “Aryans” are so perfect that they are indeed the Master Race, and that all other races are chaff, especially the Jews, whom everybody's hated since before the Flood. 

 “Mordechai! Why the fuck d

Marcello & Anita in the Trevi Fountain

In La Dolce Vita, Fellini’s 1960 masterpiece, Marcello Mastroianni’s character, “Marcello Rubini”, is on a wistful quest for love, happiness, and meaning in a world decaying around him. A journalist of temporary culture in post-war Rome, he dreams of the literary life—a life of ideas, poetry, and the intellect—but his dream is derailed at every stop when a woman appears. Case in point, the beautiful and beguiling Sylvia, the Swedish-American film star and siren who summons him from his ennui. During a charmed night, they end up not at the Trevi Fountain but in the Trevi Fountain, moments from each other’s embrace. Marcello is ready to forsake it all for her kiss, when dawn arrives, the spell

11:11, or What the Bleep Do You Know? Not Much!

Life is undeniably difficult at times. The world out there is often oblivious to our wants and needs, and unyielding in throwing us a bone, regardless of our efforts. So it’s understandable that people would latch onto something, anything, to offer the slightest germ of hope to turn their life around. That magic mantra, word, abracadabra that only needs to be uttered with a pure heart filled with faith to achieve miracles. Yes, if only life could be reduced to such blithe simplicity. And it is at this point, I believe, where we make the fundamental mistake. Instead of throwing up our hands and saying, “I got no clue” and coming together with everyone else in our collective unknowing, we step

The Audrey Hepburn: A Classy Cocktail

Cats, cocktails, class, compassion. Talk about the perfect woman. Audrey Hepburn was one classy dame, to employ the parlance of her era. Beautiful, intelligent, sophisticated, talented, fashionable. But above all else was her humanity, which shone brightly throughout her long, lustrous life. She championed the causes of human rights; of love, peace, and universal brotherhood. After a trip to Africa revealed to her how people there lived, she said, "I have a broken heart. I feel desperate. I can't stand the idea that two million people are in imminent danger of starving to death, many of them children. The 'Third World' is a term I don't like very much," she said, "because we're all one world

F#@! This is Good: A Kumquat Martini

The other day I was off to the market to get my life-sustaining supplies: cornmeal and gun powder and hamhocks and guitar strings. But as I passed the produce aisle, I saw this display of "adorable" little kumquats. How could I resist! I had invented a kumquat cocktail five years ago called "The Vietnamese Orgasm" (which is in my book TALES OF INSOMNIA DESPAIR & THE PERFECT COCKTAIL), so it was high time for something new. And since I've been exploring martini variations of late, I saw visions of a kumquat martini dancing in my head. When I arrived home, it was already complete in my mind, and now it was just a matter of assembling the ingredients and putting them together. And immediately

Bittersweet Symphony: A Naked Babe & a New Video!

"Welcome to Kevin's Cocktail Minute!" My take on the Manet painting. But instead of a picnic in the woods, it's a cocktail bar. “It’s a bittersweet symphony this life…” Ain’t it the truth! Here’s a new cocktail to help us along “that only road we’ve ever been down.” With the fantastic Milanese digestif, Ramazzotti (the very first amaro, created in 1815), Cappelletti Americano Rosso, the tangy, wine-based apéritif, and Tres Agaves Tequila Blanco. With fresh-squeezed lemon juice, Grapefruit bitters, and a dried orange slice as a garnish. Click on the link to watch VIDEO from KEVIN'S COCKTAIL MINUTE... "Bittersweet Symphony" Contemplating the cocktail, as a naked woman (Anna Child) looks on...

Plague of Locusts: "Let My People Go... to a Cocktail Bar!"

In The Bible, in Exodus 10-12, locusts are one of ten plagues visited upon Egypt after the Pharaoh refused to free the enslaved Israelites. The rub is that God Himself had “hardened the Pharaoh's heart” beforehand. So if you think about it, wasn’t this kind of underhanded, or at the very least, unfair? How did he expect the Pharaoh to act if his heart had already been hardened? Duh! But God, as they keep saying, works in mysterious ways. LOL. The other plagues included hail, lice, frogs, boils pustules and carbuncles, the death of every firstborn Egyptian son, Light beer, Reality TV, and the novels of Nicholas Sparks).

 My original intent with this drink was to create a non-sweet variatio

Modern Art: A Cubist Cocktail

Like Cubism itself, this new cocktail features angular tastes and facets of flavor coming together in a jarring composition that somehow balances itself on the palate. And I’m talking the palate in the mouth, not the artist’s palette. At first sip, there is a sweetness present. Although where it comes from, I'm not sure. The Chartreuse, perhaps. Although I never thought of Green Chartreuse as particularly sweet. Then, the angularity asserts itself. The rum and the bite of ginger liqueur, with the tartness of lime juice and the grapefruit bitters. A drink that is refreshingly complex, with bitter and sweet in harmony; a visceral experience, like Picasso’s “Les Demoiselles d’Avignon", or Duch

Retro Cocktail for April: Widow's Kiss

In a way, that most celebrated fin de siècle, the “Gay Nineties”, was the last hurrah before things got serious. Think of what happened just ten years later, at the dawn of the 20th Century. Electricity, the automobile, the airplane, Freud and Modern Psychology, Einstein’s Theory of Special Relativity, Quantum Physics, Modern Art, atonal music, the development of the radio and of motion pictures, not to mention the strife and entanglements that would precipitate a revolution in Russia and a Great World War. Looking back, we can cut them some slack, those happy, insouciant souls from an age that would soon disappear. So let’s forget the present and the future for a moment and inhabit one of

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                                     ©2016, ©2017 by Kevin Postupack.

 

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